


Wouldn't Change a Thing

by Lobotomite



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: F/F, references to coerced abortion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-12-07 05:34:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11616957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lobotomite/pseuds/Lobotomite
Summary: Rebecca had never wanted to be a mum.





	Wouldn't Change a Thing

Bex would be lying if she said she hadn't fancied Debbie a little bit, when they started working together – okay, a lot. She was similar enough to Rebecca to more than keep up with her but different enough to be exciting, and she was more than easy on the eyes. And she knew there was chemistry there, knew Debbie felt it as well, so at the back of her mind she'd always considered the possibility of a fun little fling.

But an actual _relationship_ , well. That wasn't going to happen, because Debbie had kids, didn't she. Those kids would be part of the deal.

It's not that Rebecca ever _disliked_ children – she finds them as appealing and cute as anyone does, in small doses. But the idea of children of her own, of a family; she's always been the flighty one, the one who avoids responsibilities that tie her down to one place. She wasn't like Chrissie, steady and eager to make something of herself – she wasn't cut out for motherhood, she had figured. Not with the commitment that necessitated, that planting of roots.

She'd thought once, briefly, that maybe – maybe her and Robert could try. But he'd put an end to that fantasy quick enough, and maybe she hadn't wanted it to go the way it did, not really, but he was so insistent and always so good with his words, honey-sweet promises coating very real, if not stated, threats, and she'd done what he wanted.

It wasn't like she would have been a good mother anyway, she'd reasoned in the aftermath, when she was alone in bed and her thoughts wouldn't stop spinning through her head. It's not like she could have given it what it needed. She couldn't give Debbie and her kids what they need, either.

Then she'd gone and fucked up again, and Robert didn't even bother with the honey-sweet facade this time, and she knew for sure that if she had this baby, she'd be doing it by herself, so she set about doing what he wanted, what was logically for the best.

And then she couldn't. She'd been talking to everyone, and she'd thought she'd made her mind up, and then she'd been hit with the realisation that she really, really wanted this baby.

She'd known it was going to be hard, and lonely, and she knew that any chance of anything with Debbie was more than likely completely off the table – she'd heard about the Dingles, and their fierce loyalty, and Rebecca had, after all, had a hand in destroying Debbie's cousin's marriage.

But she'd continued being friendly, had lent Bex a shoulder to cry on more than once and listened to her whinge about the trials of pregnancy even though Debbie had done in twice, and in far worse circumstances besides.

"We all knew what Robert was like," Debbie had answered, when Bex had asked in a bout of self pity why Debbie was giving her the time of day. "Aaron did too, I reckon, but... sometimes you need a smack in the face to admit that the person you thought you loved, the one you thought they were deep down, is just a pack of lies to keep you sweet."

Her face is dark for a moment, and Rebecca didn't know the details, but she'd known Debbie was thinking about her own non-stellar ex; but her face quickly cleared, and she'd given Rebecca one of those small smiles that are more in the eyes than the mouth, and said, "We all owe you a favour, really. We're well glad he's finally rid."

Debbie had been... she'd been a rock, through the pregnancy. Bex doesn't know how she would have managed without her. Of course she'd had support from Chrissie, and her dad and Ronnie, and lovely Vic; but Debbie knew more intimately what she was going through. Chrissie had raised Lachlan by herself for a long time, of course, but the pregnancy, the bit that Bex had been going through; she hadn't done that alone.

So she ended up spending a lot of time at Debbie's, as got further along and her belly got bigger and bigger, and she started spending time with Debbie's kids, as well, because they're a massive part of her life, of course they are.

And they're delightful, little Sarah and Jack – Sarah took to her first, Jack being the quieter of the two by far, but he's a sweetheart as well, and he warms up to her quietly and steadily.

And then before she even knew what happened, Debbie's life and hers were intertwined, and she knew the kid's schedules and their favourite drinks and snacks and she was finding toys in her purse and in her car and every-bloody-where, it felt like, and when Debbie one day looked at her – standing pregnant in her kitchen as Sarah skipped out of the room with a bright grin and a probably-still-too-hot home made cookie – and stepped forward and pulled her into a kiss, it felt like this was where she'd been headed her entire life.

Being a mum had never been a part of her plans for life. But walking into _their_ living room with Jack on her hip, seeing Sarah colouring on the table and Debbie cradling _their_ son in her arms, soft, maternal smile on her face, she can't believe she got so lucky.


End file.
